Since 1999, I have been climbing up the property ladder to search out the proper home in a giant metropolis. What I’ve realized is that there is not any such factor as the proper home. There is a good-enough home or an almost-perfect home, however there’s at all times no less than one or two issues lacking to make a home perfect.
Moreover, the proper home modifications as your family measurement modifications. As a single particular person, the proper home could also be a one-bedroom residence in a pleasant a part of city. As a pair, the proper home could also be a two-bedroom single-family residence with a view. With kids, the proper home could require one thing else.
Now that I am a mum or dad who will seemingly increase kids in a giant metropolis their whole pre-adult lives, I might like to the touch upon all of the concerns of what makes an ideal home.
There is no bodily asset that may present you as a lot pleasure as shopping for an excellent home for your loved ones. Not a elaborate automobile or a uncommon watch. Not even a life-size golden statue of you outdoors your alma mater after a giant donation.
As soon as you discover that home, you’ll really feel like all of your laborious work and sacrifice had been value it. A pleasant home will even inspire you to proceed rising in your present endeavor.
To explain the proper home in a giant metropolis, we are going to contact upon:
- Phases of life
- Renovations
- Views
- Usable heaps
- Variety of flooring and structure
- The perfect sq. footage per particular person in family
- En suite loos
- Location and noise
- The significance of affordability
What I Used To Assume Was The Good Home In A Massive Metropolis
When you select to reside in a giant metropolis, land, residing house, and privateness are at a premium. I wished all these issues however could not afford any of them!
Once I lived in Manhattan, I rented a 360-square-foot studio residence with my highschool buddy. We had no house, no yard, and completely no privateness. However I did not care as a result of I used to be working 70 hours every week within the workplace. On the time, the proper home value the least quantity attainable!
A few years later, I believed the proper home was a $10 million brownstone on the Higher West Aspect. Simply proudly owning your whole constructing was large. In fact, the fee was unaffordable to all however the choose high 0.1% of the wealthiest folks. However a younger man might at all times dream.
Twenty-five years later, I do not assume a 20-foot-wide brownstone on 5 ranges is the proper home to lift a household. So many stairs aren’t nice for the knees as we age. As well as, stairs could be harmful for infants and toddlers.
I additionally do not wish to be crammed so carefully to my neighbors after paying a lot, nor do I need such a small yard for my kids to play in.
OK, when you twist my arm, I guess I might increase my household of 4 in a $14 million brownstone with 7 bedrooms, 5 loos, and seven,045 sq. ft under. There are worse locations to reside. But it surely’s not the proper metropolis home for me.

The Good Home Modifications Over Time
In 2003, I purchased a two-bedroom, two-bathroom, 990-square-foot condominium with a balcony and a park view for $580,500. On the time, I believed the value was a steal as a result of similar-sized condos going through Manhattan’s Central Park would simply commerce at double the worth. In my mid-20s with a girlfriend, this was the proper “home” in a giant metropolis for us.
In 2005, I believed I had purchased an ideal home: a three-bedroom, two-bathroom, 2,070-square-foot single-family residence with a small yard. The home had two tales over a ground-floor backyard room with a rest room, which added a further unwarranted 230 sq. ft.
Our imaginative and prescient was to make use of the backyard room for company, one of many bedrooms as an workplace, one as a nursery, and one as our foremost bed room. We imagined taking our infant to play within the small yard and ultimately rising tall sufficient to choose some apples.
The Imaginative and prescient Did not Pan Out
We deliberate to develop into our new home. Sadly, our kids by no means got here, so we owned a home that was too large for nearly ten years. What a waste. At the very least we rented out the backyard room for a lot of the years we had been there to generate some semi-passive revenue.
We needed to sacrifice location as a way to simply afford a single-family residence on the north facet of San Francisco. Fortunately, we had been capable of promote the home for a revenue and reinvest the proceeds in shares and personal actual property to earn 100% passive revenue and distributions.
Reworking Helps You Create The Good Home
By way of our expertise proudly owning a home that was too large, we downsized to a 20% smaller, however 40% cheaper home in 2014 with ocean views on the west facet of San Francisco. It solely had two bedrooms throughout 1,720 sq. ft on the time.
Over the course of a yr, we reworked the house by constructing a 3rd bed room and a small workplace, increasing to about 1,970 sq. ft. We additionally constructed a deck, put in a sizzling tub, and created a luxurious grasp rest room.
To us, this was the proper home for simply the 2 of us or to lift one baby. Having the ability to rework a home to our tastes and wishes helped us briefly create the proper home.
Dwelling Enchancment Instance By way of Reworking
After ending the bottom flooring house from a “rumpus room” right into a foremost bed room and workplace, I wished to blow out the partitions and create a deck. Coming from Hawaii, I at all times appreciated indoor/outside residing, particularly if I might see the ocean.
Try the earlier than and after footage under.



How superior is that this deck addition?! Including French doorways additionally introduced in far more gentle, because the room confronted west. For the reason that home windows in the home had been already 60 years outdated, it felt nice to interchange them with one thing new.
Our son beloved taking part in on the ~300 sq. foot deck outdoors. Nonetheless, we had been usually paranoid about him falling over, given the deck was 12 ft within the air. Therefore, if you’ll construct a deck whereas having kids, be certain the railing is vertical, robust, and slender. Youngsters will climb horizontal railings and attempt to get by way of every thing. Please ceaselessly do security checks.
After ending all our transforming tasks, the home was good for 3 years. Nonetheless, with the anticipation of our daughter in December 2019, we seemed for extra space.
For higher sleep, we wished every baby to have their very own room, which meant I might not have an workplace to jot down in. Fortunately, a home with yet one more story (three complete) got here up on the market two homes down, so we purchased it and set to work transforming that one as nicely.
Views And Useable Land For The Good Home
The right home for us now has to have each views and usable land (flattish land). I really like views of any kind of water. Views have a relaxing side to them and are nice for one’s psychological well being. Nonetheless, the higher your views, the much less usable land you usually have.
In one other home, we had views of the ocean on all ranges with balconies to take pleasure in as nicely. Nonetheless, the land was steeply sloped as a result of we had been excessive on high of a hill. Fortunately, the decrease deck was about 720 sq. ft, which was sufficient house for our toddler and now child to scooter and run round on. We even had inflatable pool events.
Nonetheless, I anticipated that as the youngsters grew greater, they’d need extra space. Each our kids have what looks like an infinite quantity of vitality. Subsequently, discovering a house with a big useable lot was my subsequent mission as a father. In reality, I might say a big usable lot is extra necessary than having superb views when you’ve got kids.
Any mum or dad is aware of that elevating younger kids could be exhausting. So, having a big lot for them to play on is a godsend as a result of it’s going to assist put on them out for bedtime!
The issue is, discovering a house with a big useable lot usually means the house will not have views. Therefore, if you’ll find one, the worth might commerce at a large premium.
An Enclosed Lot For The Security Of Your Kids
The right home does not simply have a big usable lot; it is also enclosed for privateness and security. You don’t need your kids operating outdoors with no obstacles resulting from automobiles and random pedestrians driving or strolling by in a giant metropolis. As a substitute, the proper home has an enclosed entrance and yard with a gate.
However discovering such a house is extraordinarily uncommon. The overwhelming majority of properties in large cities, perhaps 95%+, haven’t any enclosed entrance yards. As a substitute, there’s simply the sidewalk, probably some steps, after which the entrance gate or door. If the home does have a entrance yard, it’s normally not enclosed.
With the advantage of hindsight, we would not have wished to lift our kids in the home we lived in for nearly 10 years with an unwarranted backyard room. It was on a busy avenue subsequent to one of many busiest streets in all of San Francisco. It might have felt too unsettling to have younger youngsters stroll outdoors with a lot visitors, to not point out the elevated air pollution from all of the autos.
One-Story Home As The Best Home To Increase A Household
Ranch-style properties sit on one story. They’re fascinating as a result of lack of stairs and the benefit of speaking with different relations. Nonetheless, given usable land value a premium in large cities, ranch-style properties are unusual.
Beneath is an instance of a ranch-style residence in San Francisco that sits on a big 8,659-square-foot lot. The lot measurement is uncommon given the typical lot measurement is nearer to 2,500 sq. ft. As well as, the house had some views. Because of this, the house bought for $1 million over asking, at $5,705,000 in 2024.
You possibly can simply think about letting the youngsters, child, and furry animals out to play on this enclosed yard. How great.
If the house ever comes again in the marketplace once more, I believe it’s going to face one other bidding struggle or obtain an impressive preemptive supply. To have a home you’d discover within the suburbs in a giant metropolis is extremely fascinating.

I am Not A Fan Of One-Story Homes
A one-story home shouldn’t be for everybody. Personally, I do not wish to reside in a single in the intervening time as a result of our children are so loud and rowdy that I might go nuts attempting to jot down!
Sure, ranch-style properties have wings that may be enclosed with a door. However except your own home is over 6,000 sq. ft, the noise travels fairly simply on one stage. This home is nearer to three,600 sq. ft.
If I needed to go to an workplace to work, a one-story home can be extra appropriate. Maybe when my youngsters are each in class full-time and over 10 will I choose a one-story home extra. Nonetheless, in the intervening time, an ideal home for us requires multiple story.
Two Tales As The Good Home With Youthful Kids
Having two or three tales is extra fascinating to lift a household in a giant metropolis, particularly if one or each dad and mom usually work at home. In fact, the home’s structure could have one thing to do with the variety of tales as nicely. Ideally, there are bedrooms on each flooring on reverse ends, not on high of one another.
Two tales present much-needed separation, particularly you probably have younger youngsters. One stage could be a cyclone mess of toys, whereas the opposite stage could be clear and for adults.
On the child stage, the youngsters can scream their heads off, and you’ll be much less impacted working in your workplace upstairs or downstairs. Ideally, there is a door to rope off the downstairs space to assist stop noise from touring upstairs or vice versa.
As the youngsters become older, having the youngsters on one stage and the dad and mom on one other stage could present some much-needed privateness for each events. Nonetheless, you probably have mischievous youngsters, you run the chance of them doing issues they don’t seem to be imagined to.
We’ve a two-story home now, which we take pleasure in. Nonetheless, I hear my youngsters extra usually than after we had been in our earlier home, which is distracting whereas working. Fortunately, we have now a pleasant yard for them to play outdoors in.

Three Ranges Might Be Even Higher For Work From Dwelling Dad and mom
Three tales may also be the proper home, particularly when you can enter on the primary stage and one stage goes up whereas one other stage goes down. This minimizes loads of stair utilization given most individuals take pleasure in the primary stage after which the bed room stage.
Three tales is unbelievable for sound buffering if you’re on the highest stage and your youngsters are on the underside stage. We had this in our outdated home, which made me extra productive in writing posts on Monetary Samurai and my bestseller, “Purchase This Not That,” in the course of the pandemic. We had been all at all times at residence, so having this separation actually helped.
At 47 years outdated, my knees are nonetheless robust sufficient to stroll round a three-story home with out issue. Nonetheless, by the point I am 60, I would favor residing in a two-story home the place the primary flooring has a kitchen, rest room, lounge, and bed room. In different phrases, the proper home if you’re older could also be one through which climbing up or down stairs is not needed.
We’ve this flooring plan structure in our current home now. So, though it isn’t good from a sound-reducing perspective, it may be extra perfect in about 5 years as soon as my daughter turns 10 and my son 12.
In different phrases, when shopping for your good home, assume how your loved ones’s life-style will change throughout your length of possession. Your own home won’t be perfect now, but it surely might get higher over time.
The Best Sq. Ft Per Individual In Family
When it comes to the proper home measurement, you need sufficient residing house to be happy, however not a lot house that you just lose that heat and comfortable feeling as a household. Smaller homes power relations to work together extra, which could be nice for constructing stronger bonds.
Once I was in my 20s with no kids, I believed 500 sq. ft per particular person was perfect. In the present day, with two younger kids, the perfect sq. footage per particular person has elevated to 800 – 1,200. It amazes me how a lot house kids have to run round endlessly, which is why a big useable yard is a requirement.
After about 1,200 sq. ft per particular person, the home begins feeling too large, with one too many unused rooms. Wasted house appears like losing meals—not an excellent feeling. Nonetheless, if you’re wealthy sufficient, you would possibly really feel OK about waste.
Contemplate the variety of sq. ft you need per particular person in your family. As well as, the extra ranges you’ve got in your own home, the decrease your required sq. footage per particular person as a result of every flooring creates extra privateness.
The Good Home Should Have En Suite Bogs
All of us are inclined to go to the toilet at comparable occasions—after we get up, after we eat, earlier than we go to mattress, and several other occasions in between. Because of this, having en suite loos for every bed room is a should. An en suite rest room is one that’s connected to a bed room, guaranteeing full privateness.
What number of occasions have we needed to go to the toilet, solely to be locked out as a result of somebody is already utilizing it? Annoying! What number of occasions have we walked out of the bathe with simply our underwear or a towel on, solely to run right into a visitor or member of the family? Awkward!
With an en suite rest room, all of the awkwardness and privateness points go away. This was my key realization after my dad and mom visited us in San Francisco after we purchased our present home. As a result of they every had en suite loos, there was minimal-to-zero rigidity.
Bidets Are A Should
If you are going to have an en suite rest room, you had higher have a bidet. Toto bidets are my favourite as they’ve heated seats, heat water, drying features, computerized shut and open features, and computerized cleansing features. Utilizing water to wash your self is vastly superior to solely utilizing rest room paper.
When you go bidet, you’ll by no means return. When in search of the proper home, be certain there may be {an electrical} outlet behind or close to the bathroom. In the present day’s bidet’s have to be plugged in. I’ll by no means purchase a future residence if {an electrical} outlet shouldn’t be inside three ft of the bathroom. Remodelers take notice!
Location Issues Enormously For The Good Home
On the whole, attempt to purchase on the quietest block attainable in the most effective neighborhood attainable. If you cannot discover or afford a home on the quietest block, then purchase wherever you’ll be able to in the most effective neighborhood. Alternatively, from an investor’s standpoint, search for extra reasonably priced neighborhoods with robust native financial catalysts that may ultimately increase demand for properties in that space.
Noise issues enormously, particularly after a protracted day of labor or childcare. You wish to come residence to a quiet place the place you’ll be able to chill out. Listening to fixed visitors noise and music from neighbors partying or speaking can destroy your temper. Having your youngsters get up in the course of the night time resulting from a disrespectful neighbor is infuriating.
Sadly, discovering a house on a quiet avenue in a giant metropolis could be difficult. The quietest and most secure properties are typically within the hills with the least quantity of visitors. Houses on dead-end streets or at dead-ends are additionally usually quieter. Lastly, properties in gated communities or these with HOAs could have noise ordinances that assist guarantee extra peaceable residing.
Thankfully, to cut back outdoors noise, you’ll be able to add triple-pane home windows or “soundproof” storm home windows. You too can set up carpets all through your house to higher take up sound. Moreover, search for properties the place the primary bedrooms are away from the road.
Please spend time tenting out at varied hours of the day earlier than shopping for a home. The morning noise might very nicely be totally different from the night noise.
The Good Home Should Really feel Reasonably priced
With all this discuss transforming, location, views, variety of tales, sq. footage, giant heaps, and bidets, one factor the proper home should have is the sensation of affordability.
When you’re feeling burdened about your mortgage and property taxes, then you do not have the proper home. As a substitute, your own home will really feel like a burden. Such monetary pressure will even negatively have an effect on your temper and psychological well being.
The fixer-upper we purchased in 2014 felt like the proper home partially as a result of it was 40% cheaper than the home we used to reside in with out having to vary cities. I wished to right-size partially as a result of I left my job in 2012.
Regularly spending cash to transform the home and make it new felt great. Though it wasn’t a elaborate home, it felt good on the time as a result of it was so reasonably priced.
The home we presently reside in felt virtually unaffordable for the primary six months. I used to be primarily home wealthy money poor, hoping for no giant sudden bills. It additionally took time to get used to giant water payments and a heftier property tax invoice. Nonetheless, as my monetary scenario improved, so did my feeling that we bought an excellent home.
Do not underestimate the optimistic emotion of having the ability to lower your expenses.
Key Classes From Discovering The Good Home For Your Household
To recap, listed here are the necessary classes for these of you wanting to search out the proper home within the metropolis:
- No Such Factor as Good: There’ll at all times be nicer homes for more cash, a few of which is able to by no means be accessible. Moreover, your thought of an ideal home will change as your family modifications.
- Affordability Issues: The virtually good home is one that matches your finances and your family wants on the time. If the home does not really feel reasonably priced, it isn’t the proper home.
- Future-Proofing: If you’re planning to develop the dimensions of your family, shopping for a barely bigger home with yet one more bed room could make sense. Nonetheless, your loved ones plans could by no means come to fruition.
- Improve Choices: You possibly can at all times improve homes, so do not assume it’s a must to instantly purchase the proper home for what your family measurement will finally be.
- Reworking Helps: Contemplate shopping for a fixer to customise the house as you want. In any other case, you’ll have to pay a premium for a newly reworked residence.
- Lot and Views: The right home has each a big usable lot and nice views. The mix is uncommon, so when you discover one, attempt to purchase it.
- Area Per Individual: When deciding on the home measurement, take into consideration sq. ft per particular person in your family and the way your wants would possibly change over time.
- Multi-Story Houses: If one or each dad and mom work at home, having a home with two or three tales could also be higher than a home with just one story. Every flooring creates a special zone for higher privateness.
- Proactive Method: When you do discover the proper home inside my 30/30/3 home-buying information, so will many different folks. Because of this, you could wish to be proactive in reaching out to house owners of good homes earlier than they arrive to the market.
- Generational Funding: As soon as you purchase the proper home, attempt to hold it endlessly. This manner, you improve the utility of the home and assist your kids keep away from the painful technique of discovering the proper home themselves.
Proudly owning A Good Home Is Price It
There isn’t any bodily asset that brings me better pleasure and satisfaction than proudly owning a pleasant major residence. We spend a lot time at residence that having a pleasant home is value it.
Simply be certain to remain versatile as a result of there’s at all times a nicer home on the market. It’s going to seemingly take you shopping for or renting a number of properties to finally discover what you need. However when you get there, you’ll know.
What does the proper home seem like to you in a giant metropolis? What’s the perfect residing measurement per family member? Have you ever been capable of finding a home on a big useable lot with views? What different circumstances have I not touched upon that makes a home good?
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